I went to Teddies to watch my children both run in a steeplechase last Thursday. Tildie was running over 4.2miles and William was in a 2.2 mile race so l thought they both might be an each way bet especially as there were about 200 in each race. Well Tildie finished about 4.3 miles behind the winner and when l asked what had happened she said that she had wanted to run round with two of her friends so they could have a good chat. Pity her two friends weren’t a bit faster! Then l watched William in the 2.2mile race and was a bit surprised when he finished so far back especially as he wouldn’t have blown a candle out after the race. He needs a pair of blinkers on. We ran a couple at the weekend but they didn’t run too well. We had the first runner for the 25 Club yesterday called Zen Master and he ran a blinder. He finished 3rd in a decent race and should be winning quite soon. May l remind you all that there are a couple of shares remaining in this Club so get on the phone quick! I am getting fit for my race at Chepstow next week and thought about going for a run last Monday but unfortunately that’s as far as it got. Am still doing 25 laps of my hot tub and riding out every day so l should be OK. The race is being billed as the biggest thing that has ever happened in Wales as it’s similar to the Mayweather fight in that some legendary jockeys are going to do battle for the last time. Anyone wants to go get in touch with my secretary Lois. I was in a pub with an owner of mine last week and these two guys were at the bar. One says to his mate,’ My wife is an angel,’ His friend replies,’You’re lucky. Mine is still alive.’

I rode out for Richard Hughes last week as l wanted to sit on a horse that he thought might make a jumper. He was not a bad type but still a maiden so l asked Hughsie what he wanted for him and nearly fell off him when he told me the price! We had the most lovely horse arrive from Germany on Saturday called Leoro and unfortunately for him we did a little operation on him yesterday which will mean he will no longer think about the opposite sex. There are a few people l know that could do with the same op. Come back with that now! Bad dog, bad dog! or this patient already has some kids though? We went to a wine tasting dinner at Nicky Hendersons on Friday night which was very entertaining although it was quite hard to get a drink. On Saturday night l went to stay with my gorgeous girlfriend Kate in Portishead where we went to a Michelin Star restaurant near the harbour which was delicious. On Sunday we had another syndicate lunch which all went very well. I have been riding out two lots every morning in an attempt to get fit for this Legends race on the 14th October and to help even more l have got a new mattress for my bed! I used to go out with a girl with a wooden leg but l had to break it off. We have action at long last with entries over the weekend and beginning of next week so fingers crossed!

We had a power cut yesterday which meant we had no phones, internet and more importantly no hot tub!  I am on a fitness regime right now as l’m trying to get myself ready for The Legends race on the 14th October at Chepstow.  I have thought about going for a run but that’s about as far as it got and l might take the dog for a walk but she hates exercise nearly as much as l do.  But l am still doing twenty five lengths of the hot tub every night with a glass in hand.  Don’t take life too seriously: you won’t get out alive!

I bought a lovely horse in Germany called Leoro who arrives here on Saturday.  He is a winner on the flat and is a big scopey sort who will jump a fence one day.  Unfortunately for him he has got a date with the vet on Monday to remove a couple of things that he won’t be needing!  We had our first 25Club lunch last Sunday and we have two more syndicate lunches over the next week which seem to go down well.

I went to the doctors last week and told him that my hair was falling out. I said to him have you got anything to keep it in? He said certainly and gave me a plastic bag!

I went to Paul Nicholls’ Open Day the other Sunday as it’s always nice too catch up with some of my ex owners and see a few nice horses. Having seen a few of his l think we have a nice bunch! My two kids went back to school last week having had more holidays than Thomas Cook so hopefully they will get their heads down now and do a bit of work! I went to Doncaster Sales last week and all the horses l fancied made silly money. The next day l flew to Germany to look at about twenty horses. Most of them were in Peter Schiergens yard which we have had a lot of luck out of with the likes of Seventh Sky and many others. I really liked three of them and although one of them has already gone l am very keen to get the other two as they are fantastic value unlike over here. I had the most delicious lunch in my favourite fish restaurant in Düsseldorf which was a good thing as l then had a nine hour wait at the airport and got home after midnight. We’ve had some pretty awful weather here with a lot of rain and the odd storm so the ground is getting quite soft. We have got our horses very forward and they will be ready to run quite soon and hopefully pick up a few races before the they get more competitive. I am getting myself fit for The Legends Race at Chepstow and swam twenty lengths of my hot tub yesterday without spilling a drop of my Chardonnay so l am going the right way. If any of you would like to come to Chepstow have lunch and be an owner for the day on October 14th l will give it to the person who puts in the highest sponsorship for our charity. It should be a good day as there is some good racing on the card. My bank phoned yesterday and it’s official. My yearnings exceed my earnings! The best way to keep your bills down is to get a paperweight!

Here are some photos of Morney Wing, Some Kind of Lama, & Fixed Rate from The Steeplechasers Open Day.  Morney, ridden by Harry Bannister is looking at the camera when he should be concentrating!  Winning the Sussex National last season has clearly gone to his head!

Haven’t done a blog for a while as l have been on holiday in South Africa with Kate, and my two kids Matilda and William.  We had a great time in Cape Town and then went on a safari at Amakala to see the ‘big five’ which consists of elephant, rhino, lion, buffalo and cheetah. If you wanted to see the ‘big five’ over here it would probably consist of Mick Easterby, P Nicholls,Chapple Hyam, P Blockley and Stan Moore .  And you wouldn’t have to fly to South Africa to see them!

We haven’t got much to run right now although l did buy a couple of three year olds to run over hurdles this month as they’re both race fit.  We are getting all the others fit and they are cantering away with a view to having them ready for the beginning of October.  We have some nice horses to go novice chasing with including Some Kinda Lama, Pickamix, Like The Sound, Wishicould and Maid Of Milan which should be quite exciting.  I think American Gigolo will do well in his novice hurdles and we have some new lrish horses who all look as if they will do a job.  I have started to ride out two every morning and enjoy getting on some of the new ones to find out what they’re like.

We are getting busier as the horses are now coming in and the lads are coming back from their holidays.  Watched Andy Murray get beaten at Wimbledon which put me in the dumps and then to see Konta get beaten as well really did make me depressed.  I bought a superb new tennis racket last week and feel like taking it back now!

Have been at Newmarket for the last two days for the sales and managed to buy a couple of nice three year olds to go hurdling . They will run quite soon as they are fit from the flat and we just need to teach them to jump and of course find owners for them.  I was in a queue at the Co-Op last week buying a jar of coffee and was behind this young fella who was asking the woman on the till a question.  He was looking a bit embarrassed and finally asked her if they sold any contraceptives in the shop.  She replied ‘No but have you tried Boots’? He looked a bit puzzled and said ‘Do you think that would work’?

Had a good Ascot although it was a bit hot on Tuesday and Wednesday but at least the rain stayed away so no complaints.  The best place to sell the odd share in a syndicate is in the car park after the last race where everyone is very jolly having had a glass or three!  All the talk from the car park was of two very well known NH trainers having a handbags at dawn on Tuesday evening after having had a couple of glasses!

We have started to get the horses back from grass now as they have been out for nearly two months and are looking quite fat.  We give them a good shampoo, get some shoes on them and ride them round the roads for the next month.  My kids broke up from school last weekend and they now get nearly nine weeks off for the summer holidays which is not bad.  Wish l was a teacher! 

We have got Albert and Kyryl on holiday but have had three new members of staff start in the last week or so.  Have had to mow my lawn quite a bit lately which reminded me of an incident with my ex. Her whole body bucked and heaved as she felt a hot throbbing between her legs. That’s the last time she ever went on my ride-on lawnmower!

Have been sitting on a boat going round the Greek islands which l can thoroughly recommend as long as your skipper knows what he’s doing. Luckily we where in the hands of Johnny Seth-Smith who was far more able than l gave him credit for and had a lovely boat which we all took turns to steer.

We had a wonderful day last Friday at Sandown where we sponsored a race for a great friend and owner of mine in Judy Maynard. We called the race The Judy Maynard ‘Hello Darling’ Maiden Stakes, and we had a box with lots of Judy’s friends in, and the racecourse looked after us really well.

We have hardly got any horses in at the moment and are getting ready to get them back next month when l should think they will be quite pleased to come in.  This week l have got four days at Royal Ascot where l can catch up with a lot of my owners and maybe sell the odd horse!  I remember an Ascot week a few years ago when my ex said ‘I’m a very naughty girl,’ biting her lip,’l need to be punished.’ So l invited my mother to stay for the weekend!

Am afraid l haven’t done my blog for a while as l was at Doncaster last week buying horses. It was a very difficult market and l only ended up with one but he looks a nice type and he is for The 25 Club so l hope he’s decent! We had a very good stag day for Paul Fitzsimmons last week which was fairly exhausting! We played 18 holes of golf in the morning, followed by lunch then a 30 lap race in go karts followed by a very good dinner at The Harrow. Quite a day! Managed to fall off and cracked a rib which has been quite painful especially when laughing or sitting in the car. Most of the horses are out in the field and we are getting all the boxes steam cleaned and painted ready for them to come back in July. We haven’t had many runners lately as most of them are out but we ran Ocean Jive yesterday and he won having his first run over hurdles and beating the odds on favourite. It keeps our strike rate up to 50% which makes everyone happy. My sister Victoria came to stay and she and Kate went to Chelsea Flower Show on Friday and had a wonderful time. We all went to Eton Dorny on Sunday which is an Olympic venue for rowing and my daughter Tildie was taking part in a four. She was in a race of 8 boats and her boat won which we were terribly excited about and all jumping up and down. We spoke to her coach after who was very laid back about it and said of course they were odds on shots so l explained to him about a winners a winner especially when your daughters in the boat! We now have three very nice horses in The 25 Club and may buy the last one at Cheltenham on Thursday to make it up to the four. There are one or two more shares available so get in touch to avoid disappointment. The bed shook, creaked and rattled as she gripped the headboard and screamed out my name. At this point we were asked to leave Debenhams!